紧急！！！英文高手进，帮我改这篇短文

Question

This is a wonderful book,the Secret Garden.The story was written by Frances.It tell us a girl who named Mary is a sorriness girl.No one like her.She was sent to Yorkshire when hie parents died.She lived with his uncle in a very big and old house.In this house,she felt lonely and fidgety.In the sequel,she heard of the Secret Garden.Her lifehad a great change.In the end,everything would turn into beauty.
帮忙改改。
还有You don't know I am to like this book how!（你不知道我是多么喜欢这本书！）这句话是对是错？谢谢了

Answer 1

修改版：This is a wonderful book--the Secret Garden. The story is written by Frances. It tells us that a girl (who)可以去掉 named Mary is a sorriness girl（不明白想表达什么意思）. No one likes her. She is sent to Yorkshire when her parents die. She lives with her uncle in a very big and old house. In this house, she feels lonely and fidget. In the sequel, she hears of the Secret Garden. Her life has a great change. In the end, everything would turn into beauty.

你不知道我是多么喜欢这本书！ You’ll never know how much I love this book.

更连贯的表达如下：
The Secret Garden is a remarkable book written by Frances. In the story, Mary, a pity girl, is disliked by others. Her parents dying, she is sent to Yorkshire, in which she lives with her uncle. Lonely and fidget, she hears of the Secret Garden. Her life changes greatly as a result. Everything becomes beautiful in the end.

Answer 2

你这个是不是短文改错啊?还是你自己写的文章要大家来修改啊?

前者每行只能改你一个错,后者那就可以想怎么改就怎么改了~

建议把"tell"改成"told",因为全文过去时(第一句只是个描述的,所以不用)
在把"who"去掉,直接用过去分词做定语
在把"like"改成"likes",三单
在把"his"改成"her",人的性别一致
"fidegty"是个名词,建议改个形容同源词,作表语......

你所说的那句话是个宾语重句接感叹句倒装,这几个都是自己的弱项,所以SORRY

Answer 3

1、第一行It tell -> It tells It后动词要用第三人称单数。
2、第二行Mary is a sorriness girl -> Mary was a pitiful girl
叙述书中内容要用一般过去时。
3、第二行No one like her.->No one liked her.
4、第二行when hie parents died -> when her parents died.拼写错误。
5、第四行everything would turn into beauty ->everything turned into beauty.此处不需过去将来时，用一般过去时就可以。

另外最后一句话应说成：You don't know how I love this book!

其他错误若没有看出请谅解。本回答被提问者采纳

Answer 4

It tell us ----It tells us
when hie parents ---when her parents
with his uncle ---with her uncle
Her lifehad a great change有点中式英语－－Her life changed a lot
everything would turn into beauty--去掉would
另外，书或电影的情节，不是用过去式，而是用一般现在时，所以文章的时态都要改，这个你应该会，我就不班门弄斧了。
You don't know I am to like this book how!这句话听起来别扭，貌似不对，改为，you don't know how I like the book
能力有限，其它地方未指正之处还请谅解。

Answer 5

This is a wonderful book,the Secret Garden.The story is written by Frances.It tells us a girl named Mary was a sorry girl.No one liked her.She was sent to Yorkshire when hie parents died.She lived with his uncle in a very big and old house.In this house,she felt lonely and fidgety.In the sequel,she heard of the Secret Garden.Her life had a great change.In the end,everything would turn into beautiful.