第1个回答 2022-06-19
What is the best advice you've received?
你收到过的最好的建议是什么？
A very smart woman I worked with once told me that if I eliminated the word "but" from my professional vocabulary, I'd find greater acceptance for my ideas, and greater cooperation from my team members. She said people would have a very different perception of me if I could change this one thing.
与我共事的一位很聪明的女士曾经告诉我，如果把“但是”这个词从我的常用口头词汇中消除，我的想法将更容易被接受，我的团队与我的合作会更加完美。她说如果我改掉这一点，别人会对我有非常不同的看法。
The reason, she said, is because the word "but" negates everything that precedes it, and you cast a negative spin on anything you say when you use it.
原因呢，她说，因为“但是”这个词会否定这个词之前的所有东西，当你用了这个词，所有事都被阐明的有否定的倾向。
Consider, for example, "We can do it this way, but it'll be way too expensive given our budget," versus "We can do it this way, and if we do, we'll need to cut back on other important features." The first indicates that we can't even consider the option. The second acknowledges possibility and describes consequences.
想一下，比如“我们可以这么做，但是相对于我们的预算太昂贵了”对比“我们可以这么做，如果我们这么做了，我就需要削减其他方面的开支”，第一个可以看出我们甚至都不能考虑选择了。第二个说出了可能性同时也考虑了结果。
"But" is exclusive and isolating, "and" is inclusive and welcoming.
She was absolutely right, and it's advice I have used with great success for the past 30 years of my life.
“但是”，很排外，很孤立，“并且”很包容，很欢迎。她肯定是对的，在过去的三十年里，这经验带给我很大的成功。
原文作者及出处： Marsha Browne , quora.com
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